In my last piece about women leaders and authentic voice, I noted that even if most of us never end up leading major protest movements, we still often face difficult leadership moments where we can either act or speak up, or let problematic behavior or policy pass unchallenged. And that one of the reasons it’s worth doing the work of developing a strong, authentic voice is that it helps give us the inner strength to choose the former over the latter.
Related to that thought about everyday leadership, however, is another fundamentally important, but often overlooked, point to think about, when we dream about changing the world.
When I was in my mid-20s, I remember complaining to my mother about having a job that, at least in my eyes, wasn’t allowing me to have meaningful, immediate, significant impact on the world. Important to note, here, is that the reason I had that job was that the job market in the early 1980s was pretty awful for recent college graduates. And I had not just rent, food, and personal expenses to cover—I also had college loans to pay.
Year later, when I was struggling to survive as a freelance writer, I understood far better the value of a job that provided those basics. I even posted a sign above my computer that said, “Mr. Paycheck is our Friend,” that I’d glance at any time I was tempted to complain about a less-than-interesting writing assignment.
But I also still remember my mom’s reply to my complaint. She told me that even though people often dream of changing the world in big, transformational ways, that wasn’t the only way to have meaningful impact. “If you want to change the world,” she said, “start where you are and do something, even if it’s something small.”
At the time, my mom was running an environmental organization in the Bronx, working to clean up the Bronx River corridor. She’d organized neighborhoods to clean up parks and pull junk out of the river, and she was creating environmentally impactful summer jobs and school year curriculum for inner city teens. She might not have been making much money, and community organizing took a lot of diplomacy and effort, but she was still effecting very significant and visible change in the world. And I envied her that. I was also young, and on fire to make my mark in the world. So I wanted not only big impact, but big impact now. As time went on, however, and I interviewed many world-changing icons, I began to realize that she was right, on more than one level.
When we talk about changing the world, we tend to imagine big innovations and Nobel-Prize winning discoveries: the invention of the personal computer (or social media platforms), alternative energy, getting justice for the oppressed, providing clean water to the world, or curing malaria. Stuff like that.
And yet, impacting smaller groups of people, or making something better in a local community, group, or place, is also changing the world. When I was writing my column for Flying magazine, I’d sometimes get letters from people saying that a column I’d written had helped ease the pain of losing a child or parent; had inspired them to reconnect with a father they’d been estranged from for decades; or had had some other really big, important impact on their lives. Was that changing the world? Not the whole world, but certainly the worlds of those individuals. And that’s worth something.
But my mother’s admonition to start where you are is insightful on another level, as well, because like it or not, changing the world is a team sport. Even if we have a great idea, we need a critical mass of people to join the effort to implement it. None of my my mom’s river-cleaning changes would have happened if she hadn’t had a knack for enlisting the support of others. Building support—for an idea, a new product or piece of technology, for changing cultural norms or policies, or any other ambitious goal—is almost always a gradual, challenging, and team effort. So how we build and nurture those teams—starting small, and where we are—matters.
Even if all a potential world-changer really cares about is the end goal, paying attention to good team interactions is still important, because lots of research shows that teams produce better results, and get more done, if the personal interactions among members are healthy and respectful. Good people don’t stay on dysfunctional teams, or with dysfunctional leaders. And if individuals don’t feel heard, or if voicing concerns leads to negative responses, potential safety issues or product problems can be missed. Motivation also drops. People may do what’s required, but they’re less inspired to go above and beyond. Volunteers drop away; even paid employees don’t always give their best effort. So it behooves anyone interested in changing the world to pay attention first to changing the interactions of those working with them for the better.
Beyond those purely utilitarian concerns, however, is an often-overlooked secondary truth. And that is, we don’t just change the world through what we produce, invent, or achieve. We also materially change our surrounding world, with a rippling effect beyond that, by how we go about those aspirations. Some of those entrepreneurial, world-changing icons were also known for being pretty brutal to the people they recruited to help them get there. Sure, that new piece of technology made some people rich. Made life infinitely more convenient. Or maybe even helped alleviate some big problem in the world. But at what cost? If we allow or sow disrespect, harassment or abuse on the way to changing the world, have we really done such a good thing?
Some people would argue that the ends justify the means. That the end is so important, or has such breakthrough potential, that if it takes berating people to make it happen, or giving bullies a pass because they’re performing toward the end goal, that’s unfortunate, but comparatively inconsequential. But I’m not comfortable with that answer. It reminds me of the attitude all too many pharmaceutical researchers have toward “miracle” drugs. Great! It reduces your changes of a recurrence of cancer by 10%! Victory! The fact that it destroys a patient’s quality of life in a dozen other ways is often brushed aside, or not even discussed. If it is, it’s often relegated to a note that side effects are unfortunate, but “tolerable” or can be “managed.” It’s a cost-benefit analysis from only the producer’s point of view, without paying much attention to the cost from the point of view of those actually impacted by it. But that doesn’t make the cost go away.
For all the big changes we might dream of making in the world, the truth is, we have the most influence over how we act and speak in interactions with our fellow humans, every single day. We motivate or hurt. We support or denigrate. We include or exclude. We inspire people to have each other’s backs, or to take care of themselves at all costs. But there’s also great potential in that truth. Because how we treat those we work and live with reverberates. If we call out the bad actions and actors, listen to alternative perspectives, and treat our fellow workers or community members with respect, we build support for another world-changing idea: respectful, supportive and mature behavior toward our fellow humans. Imagine the impact if that idea took hold around the world!
So like my mom said—if we want to change the world, we should start where we are, even if our vision is huge. We should start with paying attention to, and improving, the strength and quality of the interactions within whatever group, community, or army we’re building to effect whatever change we dream of making. The power of that kind of thoughtful and respectful teamwork, enthusiasm and commitment can be surprising. As the renowned anthropologist Margaret Mead put it, “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has.”
